Bob HopeThinkers

80 (age) is when you order a steak and the headwaiter puts it through the blender.

80 (age) is the time of your life when even your birthday suit needs pressing.

The Academy Awards is for actors and actresses to see what someone else thinks about their acting besides their press agents.

A Bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.

Bowing is done so much in Japan that you don't know which end to talk to.

Divorce is a by-product of the fact that the nuclear unit is gone.

Dying is to be avoided because it can ruin your whole career.

Failure is, for some, the only thing they'll ever been a success at.

A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.

Golf is not a relaxing game. If it is, you're not playing it right.

Golf is the only sport where the players aren't penalized for being on grass.

Laughter is capable of transforming almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.

Laughter is therapy... an instant vacation.