Don MarquisThinkers

A Bartender is one who, once he knows what drink a man will have before he orders, there is little else about him worth knowing.

The Bee is contrasted with humans in that it has its governmental system settled millions of years ago but the human race is still groping.

Christmas is a time when one can make people forget the past with the present.

A Daily column is a grave two inches wide and twenty inches deep.

Drinking is something we do only to make our friends seem interesting.

Drinking is rarely given up out of intention. An old stomach reforms more whiskey drinkers than a new resolve.

Humanity is the human race.

An Inheritance is not infrequently mistaken for work. When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: 'Whose?''

Inheritance is wholly justified. Because we pay for the mistakes of our ancestors, it seems only fair that they should leave us the money to pay with.

Instinct is related to ideas in this way: while ideas pull the trigger it is instinct that loads the gun.

Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever.

A Poet is less welcome in a publisher's office than a burgler.