Jay LenoThinkers

Abortion is an issue often believed to hinge on the idea that life begins when the fetus can exist apart from its mother. Well, by this definition, many people in Hollywood are legally dead.

The American is a nation, seventy percent of which do not understand science; and the other thirty per cent do not understand what seventy per cent means.

Celebrity is not celebrity until one's mother has heard of you.

Fame is not really fame until my mother has heard of you.

George W. Bush is the kind of guy who, if he went into a think-tank he'd likely drown.

Keith Richards is the first performer ever to accept a posthumous award in person.

Las Vegas is a city which, when it gets a few inches of snow, signals that hell is indeed freezing over.

Life is said to begin when the fetus can exist apart from its mother. By this definition, many people in hollywood are legally dead.

Osama Bin Laden is a man worth $300 million, has five wives and twenty-six kids, and hates Americans for their 'excessive' lifestyle.

Politics is just show business for ugly people.

Politics is Hollywood for ugly people.