John BarrymoreThinkers

Alimony makes you realize how short a month is.

America is the country where you can buy a lifetime supply of aspirin for one dollar and use it up in two weeks.

An Audience is a great hulking monster with four thousand eyes and forty thousand teeth.

A Bride is not happy, she is just triumphant.

Dying is the last thing one will ever do.

Dying young is understandable — The good die young because they can see it's no use living if you've got to be good.

Experience is what you have left after you have forgotten her name.

A Footnote is like running downstairs to answer the doorbell on your wedding night.

Happiness often sneaks in through a door you didn't know you left open.

Love is the delightful interval between meeting a beautiful girl and discovering that she looks like a haddock.