Contract is an agreement made up of big words and little type.

A Contract is a deceptive document — The large print giveth and the small print taketh away.

A Contract is worthless if not written — a verbal contract is not worth the paper it's printed on.

A Contract is a document written by lawyers for lawyers in order to make people immediately realise that they cannot do without lawyers.

Directions is always a wise thing to ask — ask the way even if you know the way.

Directions is something a real man never asks for when lost on the open road, at least in the presence of a female passenger; instead, he deploys his gender-based internal compass, comments on the rustic beauty of the scenic route and prays for a familiar landmark.

Directions is how to get from Point A to Point B, preferably without encountering Points C, K or Q along the way.

A Label is just a sticker with a job.

A Label is that withouth which one can’t tell the difference.

A Label is the best way to negate someone.

A Ladder is a vertical bridge.

A Ladder is stairs on hard mode

A Ladder is a portable stair skeleton.

A Ladder is a bridge going upward.