russian (language), n.All

Russian (language) is Church Slavonic with a strong Mordvin accent.

The Russian (language) is the richest of all the European family. It seems admirably adapted to express the most delicate shades of thought. Possessed of a marvelous conciseness and clearness, it can with a single word call up several ideas, to express which in another tongue whole phrases would be necessary.

Russian (language) is a language that requirrres its speakerrr to have a tongue that worrrks like a vibrrratorrr.

U.S. astronauts are required to learn Russian as part of their extensive training so they can read Russian language training manuals at the ISS, if necessary.

Russian (language) is essentially badly spelled Ukrainian.

Russian (language) is drunken Polish babytalk written with a Greek alphabet.

Russian (language) is the last few words you utter before being eaten by a polar bear.

Russian (language) is Czech vocabulary with a Polish accent.

Russian (language) is Englishovat'.