Scotland

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is a country where a one might see a guy pissing against a front door in the wee hours of the night, only to then take out his keys and go inside.

The most Scottish thing I've ever seen: I was going through a town called Bathgate at about half past eleven at night, and there was a guy pissing against a front door. He then took out his keys and went inside.

is a peculiar land that is the birthplace of golf and sport salmon fishing, a fact which may explain why it is also the birthplace of whiskey.

is a country with two seasons: June and winter.

There are two seasons in Scotland. June and winter.

is a land of meanness, sophistry and lust.

is that knuckle-end of England - that land of Calvin, oat-cakes and sulphur.

[Scotland] That garret of the earth - that knuckle-end of England, that land of the ingenious Calvin, oatcakes and sulphur.

is a country so much our enemy that there is hardly any intelligence to be got, and whenever we do procure any it is the business of the country to have it contradicted.

A country so much our enemy that there is hardly any intelligence to be got, and whenever we do procure any it is the business of the country to have it contradicted.

scotland, n.Dad Jokes

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