celery, n.Definitions

Celery is a ranch canoe

Celery is crunchy water

Celery is a vegetable which, when eaten raw, develops the jaw.

Celery is a food which you can't eat without sounding like you are stepping on a basket

Celery is the only food that has both ranch dressing and peanut butter as acceptable toppings.

Celery is as fresh and clean as a rainy day after a spell of heat. It crackles pleasantly in the mouth.... it should be eaten alone, for it is the only food which one really wants to hear oneself eat.