New York City (n.) is where an act of chivalry on the bus is not giving up one's seat to a woman loaded down with packages, but consist in whispering to her 'be alert. I get off at twenty-third street.'.
New York City (n.) is where cabs are so expensive, it's cheaper to get slugged by a mugger and wait for an ambulance.
New York City (n.) is where something happens every minute . . . And most of the time, it goes unsolved.
New York City (n.) is so dangerous that the animals in central park zoo are kept behind bars for their safety.
New York City (n.) is so distrustful, the muggers are now demanding identification.
New York City (n.) is where anybody who speaks good English must be a foreigner.
New York City (n.) is a place where that they don't give out the key to the city; they just send over a guy who shows you how to pick the lock.
New York City (n.) is the only town in the world where you can park your car, walk two blocks, and find your hubcaps for sale.
New York City (n.) is the only city in the world where friendliness is a felony.