grammar, n.One-Liners

They should ban semi-colons;no one knows how to use them

I didn't pay my syntax ...and ended up with pretty ugly sentence

You can’t run through a campsite, you can only 'ran' through one, because it’s past tents

Teacher asks her student, "If I say, 'I am beautiful,' which tense is that?"The student replied, "It is obviously past."

A man was found guilty of overusing commas.The judge warned him to expect a really long sentence

Teacher: "What is the future tense of the statement: 'I had killed a thief'?"Student: "You will go to jail."

Nobody cares how bad your English is as long as your Scotch is good.

I hate people who mix up 'there', 'their" and 'they're'It's worse than not knowing the difference between your left and write

My English teacher returned my paper, adding, 'Your grammar is terrible."I replied, 'well, then your granddad is a jerk'