computer, n.All

A Computer is a device that lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history, with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila.

What's wrong with my computer?It looks like your hard drive went soft

The Computer is no longer servant, but is now becoming guide and agent.

The Computer is incredibly fast, accurate, and stupid: Humans are incredibly slow, inaccurate and brilliant... together they are powerful beyond imagination.

A Computer is a device that can beat us at chess, but is no match for us at kick boxing.

A Computer , when it gets too hot, freezes.

The Computer is a device whose problems, in 97.3 per cent of cases, are attributable to the nut attached to the keyboard..

A Computer is like an Old Testament God - lots of rules and no mercy.

The Computer is a thing you ought never to let know you're in a hurry.