thanksgiving, n.Definitions

Thanksgiving is a great big family holiday... everybody gets together during halftime.

Thanksgiving is a day off that's usually followed by an off day.

Thanksgiving is the day Mom stuffs the turkey in the morning and the family in the afternoon.

Thanksgiving is a day all over America on which families sit down to dinner at the same moment: Halftime.

Thanksgiving is a holiday that always falls on Thursday because the Pilgrims came here in search of a four-day weekend.

Thanksgiving is an emotional holiday where people travel thousands of miles to be with people they only see once a year. And then discover once a year is way too often.

Thanksgiving is a day set apart every year to acknowledge God's favor, especially by parents whose sons have survived the football season.

Thanksgiving is a holiday where people take a dead turkey, open up the dead turkey’s ass, or carve out a really big hole in their ass, take some stuffing and shove it inside their dead empty ass, and use the little dead ass as an oven to bake some bread.