Places That Feel Like A Secret

Things Everyone Goes Through

Abuse Power Quietly

Accumulate Guilt

Answer With A Question

Are A Complete Mess

Arrive Already Apologizing

Arrive Uninvited But Expected

Arrive With The Wrong Gift

Blend In

Break In Customer Service

Burn Going Down

Burn Like Ash

Burn Like Chlorine

Burn Like Copper

Burn Like Dust

Burn Like Echo

Burn Like Glass

Burn Like Glue

Burn Like Iron

Burn Like Lint

Burn Like Metal

Burn Like Midnight

Burn Like Mildew

Burn Like Milk

Burn Like Morning

Burn Like Paper

Burn Like Rain

Burn Like Rope

Burn Like Rust

Burn Like Salt

Burn Like Smoke

Burn Like Static

Burn Like Stone

Burn Like Sugar

Burn Like Summer

Burn Like Vinegar

Burn Like Water

Burn Like Wine

Burn Like Winter

Burn Like Wire

Burn Like Wood

Burn Without Flame

Cancel You

Care For The Self

Change Temperature When Entered

Check You Twice

Come Up In Therapy

Conceal The Flaw

Cool Too Fast

Cost More Than Planned

Cry Without Warning

Curate Themselves

Dim When Noticed

Don't Age Well

Don't Quite Fit

Echo An Empty Room

Euphemize

Exhale When No One Looks

Feel Forced

Feel Intimate Too Soon

Feel Irreversible

Feel Lent Too Long

Feel Like A Punch

Feel Like A Record Scratch

Feel Like A Teenager Again

Feel Like Bad Decisions

Feel Like Regression

Feel Misplaced

Feel Overdressed

Feel Overexplained

Feel Overexposed

Feel Overheard

Feel Overlit

Feel Overripe

Feel Overstayed

Feel Overthought

Feel Overtime

Feel Paper Thin

Feel Raw

Feel Scripted

Feel Secondhand

Feel Sharp

Feel Staged

Feel Thick

Feel Too Loud

Feel Too Personal To Explain

Feel Underbaked

Feel Underdressed

Feel Underhandled

Feel Underheard

Feel Underripe

Feel Underseen

Feel Understood Too Late

Feel Undertime

Feel Underwater

Feel Underwhelming

Feel Unfinished

Finish Your Sentence

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shame

is a borderline affect which allows us to forget that there is nothing behind the masks but other masks and thereby keeps us captured in the game of interpretation. It results in our acknowledging and at the same time denying that the life we construct for ourselves is a fiction. It allows us to keep the abyss at a distance in favor of life.

Shame then becomes a borderline affect located somewhere between forgetting and remembering, between not knowing and knowing, between nature and culture. Indeed it marks a threshold, but not as Socrates and the Cynics wished us to believe the threshold between truth and appearance, but the threshold which keeps us captured in the game of interpretation, which allows us to forget that there is nothing behind the masks but other masks. Shame is a screen masked as a veil... it is the screen upon which we perceive the shadows of life, the screen which makes us believe that truth and nature are located behind it. If we were to tear off the veil, we would see nothing, certainly not any kind of metaphysical Nature or Substance. So, shame results in acknowledging andat the same time denying that the life we construct for ourselves is a fiction. If Nietzsche thus advocates the honoring of shame, he also advocates our maintaining the fiction of a truth behind appearances... all the while being conscious of the fact that there is nothing. Or, in other words: He advocates keeping the abyss at a distance in favor of life.

is a feminine characteristic par excellence and has as its purpose concealment of genital deficiency.

According to Freud, shame is 'considered to be a feminine characteristic par excellence . . . [and] has as its purpose, we believe, concealment of genital deficiency' (1916-1917, 596).

is a mental dam against the aggressive instinct or the destructive passion for the real. Unlike guilt, shame does not seek to penetrate surfaces or tear away veils... rather, it seeks comfort in them, hides itself in them as in a safe haven.

in this context, that the antidote of shame which Lacan proposes also follows Nietzsche's leads, in addition to Freud's. Shame is, as Freud put it, a 'mental dam' against the 'aggressive instinct' or the destructive passion for the Real. Unlike guilt, shame does not seek to penetrate surfaces or tear away veils... rather, it seeks comfort in them, hides itself in them as in a safe haven. Our relationships to the surface change in shame, as compared to guilt... we become fascinated with its maze-like intricacies, its richness and profundity.

is a reaction-formation and a defense against excessive pleasure, against libidinous feelings.

For Freud, shame is a reaction-formation and a defense against excessive pleasure, against libidinous feelings. Silvan Tomkins talks about shame in that way in his book The Faces of Shame. . . .

Shame is a soul eating emotion. Carl Jung

is an evaluative statement by the self in relation to the self whereas guilt is an evaluative statement by the self in relation to an action one has committed. In shame we become the object as well as the subject of shame. In guilt the object is external to the self, since the focus of guilt is upon the action that does not meet certain cultural standards.

Shame is an evaluative statement by the self in relation to the self, and this distinguishes it from guilt, which is an evaluative statement by the self in relation to an action one has committed. And four, in shame we become the object as well as the subject of shame which imprisons the subject in the complete closure of the self-object circle. In guilt, by comparison, the self is the subject, but the object is external to the self, since the focus of guilt is upon the action that does not meet certain cultural standards. The fact that shame is a painful emotion that revolves around the status of self in the field of the social enables the subject to understand his or her own conditions of existence and possibly re-negotiate his or her relationship with the social anew.

is causally connected to sexual inhibitions and to certain forms of sexual perversion.

For Freud, shame is causally connected to sexual inhibitions and to certain forms of sexual perversion.

is connected to being seen and exposed inappropriately by others.

Ibid., p. 303. For many theorist. like for Sartre, the emotion of shame is connected to being seen and exposed inappropriately by others. However, no actual observer is necessary in order to feel shame, nor is it necessary that one believe that one is being observed by the Other. One may feel shame being alone alone and knowing this to be so. Instead, in shame. the subject shifts his or her viewpoint from that of the actor to that of the critical, detached observer, but so that the subject fulfills both of these functions. The subject both identifies With the observer and constitutes the observer. It is part of the complexity of shame that the exposure it implies refers to the Other but that Other is in the first instance oneself. To speak about the observer is thus to speak metaphorically, and being seen exposed is a sign of being at a disadvantage and suffering a loss of power: and that recognition of disadvantage and suffering is what is central to shame. For a discussion, see also Taylor, 1985: Williams, 1993... Lewis... 1995: Katz. 1999.

shame, n.All

shame