murder, n.Dad Jokes

What’s yellow and kills you if you get it in your eye?A bulldozer

How do you kill a mime?Shoot him using blanks

What's the best strategy if you want to kill a circus troupe?Go for the juggler

Whatever doesn't kill you only counts as attempted murder.

Did you hear about the man bludgened to death with a can of chickpeas?It was an obvious case of hummuscide