work, n.One-Liners

A: How long have you been working here?'B: Ever since the boss threatened to fire me

Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful to have a jobI just wish it wasn't THIS job

I used up all my sick days . . .so I'm calling in dead

What do you do for a living?As little as possible

If I died and went straight to hell I think it would take me at least a week to realize I wasn't at work anymore

A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stopsOn my desk, I have a work station.

You're fired!"You woke me up for this?"

If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it?

I don't mind going to workIt's the eight-hour wait to go home that annoys me

I was arrested today over a slight misunderstanding at workApparently taking your work home is classed as theft when you work in a bank

Always give 100 per cent at work12 per cent on Monday, 23 per cent on Tuesday, 40 per cent on Wednesday, 20 per cent on Thursday and 5 per cent on Friday