pig, n.Dad Jokes

How does a pig write home?With a pigpen

What’s warm, wet, and pink?A pig in a hot tub

Why did the bakery hire a pig?He said he was really good at bacon

How do you take a pig to the hospital?By hambulance

What's the difference between a politician and a flying pig?The letter F

What would you get if you crossed a dinosaur with a pig?Jurassic pork

Why shouldn't you play sports with pigs?They always hog the ball

What did the neurotic pig say to the farmer?You take me for grunted

Why did the farmer call his pig “Ink”Because it was always running out of the pen

Why did the pig go to the casinoTo play the slop machine

How did the pig win the karate match?With a pork chop

Why did the piglet yell at his sibling at the dinner tableShe was hogging all the food

What did Papa Pig shout at his complaining kids on the family vacation?“Stop swining! We’re nearly there.”

Why did the pig give his girlfriend a box of candy?It was Valenswine's Day

What did the pig say at the beach on a hot summer's day?I'm bacon

Why couldn't the pig tell a joke?Because he was a bore

Why did the pig take a bathBecause the farmer said, “Hogwash".

Where did the piglets study their ABCs?At a school for higher loining

What do hogs do on Labor Day?Go on pig-nics

Where do pigs sleep in the summertime?In ham-mocks